3 hours

First night at home for Oskar.

First night for us without the hospital back up.

There was one feeding around 10-11pm and a bit of struggle to get him to sleep. But eventually my dad cracked it. By midnight everybody was in bed asleep. Yes, including parents and grand-parents.

2:45am we were back on.

Oskar woke up crying. 

I got up and started to prepare to feed him.

A bit later Wolfram joined us.

3am done with feeding. Wolfram is up for getting Oskar asleep.

And he tried.

Then I tried.

Then he tried again.

By 4am we decided to feed again as someone was wide awake. And that someone was not the new parents.

At 4:30am, we tried again to get him to sleep without success. 

At 4:45am we decided to go though the check-list again. We checked the diaper. Not much in there but some traces of what looked like blood to us. It was reddish. 

I woke up my mum for an expert opinion. She said she wasn't sure and it's most likely just the digestive system getting going.

We changed the diaper.

I sent Wolfram back to bed as he had to go to work in a few hours.

I stayed with my mum who helped walking with Oskar. I then tried feeding again. Followed by a burp. Followed by more walking and suddenly some gas came out.

A bit later he was finally asleep. It was 5:45am. This first night feeding took only 3 hours!!!

I was dead and I cannot imagine the morning.

Now let's all get some sleep before we have to start this all over.

Where did the time go?

I woke up at the hospital after a night in pieces (I know, I should get used to that). I had a shower and then saw the pediatrician. Soon after Wolfram arrived and so did breakfast. We had this moment of quiet while having breakfast before they brought Oskar back from his check-up. 

From there, it didn't stop. We saw the doctor who confirmed I could be discharged, the nurses briefed is on three millions of things to take care of the baby, we met the lactation consultant, we packed, we took a taxi back home (first drive of Oskar in a ... Mercedes - it had to be a German car), we settled the little guy in is new home which means we  installed what was not installed yet, we emptied the bags. I fed Oskar a couple of times.

 By 6pm, the day was nearly gone and I wondered where the time had passed. Fundamentally I did not do anything major today.  Most of my time disappeared in feeding Oskar. I had been told he would take over the schedule of a day. I didn't realize how true this would be.

Memory of Oskar's first car trip

Peacefully sleeping in a German car... feels like home?

Visitors

Today many of our friends and colleagues passed by to congratulate us and meet Oskar. I'm not sure he realized that he was the center of so much attention given he slept most of the day. We, on the other hand, were very touched to see all of them and happy to share our happiness.

We've received also a lot of wishes via email, Skype or Facebook. I feel very lucky to live at a time when we can share great news around the world so quickly. In less than 24h, family, friends, colleagues in all continents knew about Oskar. 

Thank you everyone for your wishes and gifts. We are really blessed to have you all in our lives.

Retrospectively

Retrospectively, what I thought was false labour, was actually real labour.

Retrospectively, I should have started to time contractions earlier and get Wolfram to do the emotional support part earlier. I was in so much pain it was even hard to breathe and having someone to distract me would have helped... At least a bit.

Retrospectively, the breathing exercises they teach you don't really help. They keep your mind focused on breathing vs. the pain, but that's only a distraction. When it hurts, it hurts.

Retrospectively, we should have called earlier the doctor and go to the hospital before it became so painful. But again, how could we have known these were real contractions? All the descriptions in the world cannot describe what it feels like.

Retrospectively, it was a great thing to get the epidural. I felt enough of the pain before and the one they gave me was only blocking 90% of the pain, meaning I could still feel the birth. The only difference is that it was bearable vs. the torture of the earlier contractions.

Retrospectively, I would have never thought that someone would give me a Milo drink during delivery to manage my hunger. This chocolate drink is very popular in south east Asia, but let's face it, it's more for kids than adults. If I had known, I would have eaten some pasta before going to the hospital.

Retrospectively, I am happy that Oskar had made most of his way down when I started pushing. I heard that delivering a baby in 30-40min is pretty fast. Even if it was only "pushing", it was intense pushing and I am not sure for how long I could have done that.

Retrospectively, I could have never imagined what it feels when they put the baby on the mother after birth. It was unbelievable to think that such beautiful baby came out of me. I know I said I don't want to see my baby when he is still dirty from the birth, but somehow through the eyes of a new mother, whatever blood and other substances on him disappear and only the most perfect baby remained. I guess this is why people say that we have selective memory. Instead of remembering the pain of labour and the struggle of the past 9 months, all I see is the cutest baby ever. 

Retrospectively nothing could have prepared us to the happiness when we saw him for the first time or to all the feelings we had instantly for this little guy. It's simply incredible. 

Introducing

Oskar Noah Gabriel

50cm

2.785 kg (slightly slimmer than expected)

39 weeks and a few days to bring to this world.

2 super happy parents and many more grand-parents, uncles and aunts, cousins.

True or False

Since last night I started to feel pain in my lower belly and back. I naively thought it would go away by moving, stretching or even swimming. But it did not.
At some point this afternoon I started to wonder whether these waves of pain could be contractions. And most likely they are. I have started monitoring them as they grew closer and stronger. They are still irregular which means this is "false" labor and there is still some time to go until tadpole comes out.
Still, if this is the level of pain in "false" labor, I can't imagine what it will be in "true" labor. I never really had any doubt about getting the epidural, but after today, I am 100% sure I am going for it.

By the way, whoever wrote that one can continue taking care of things (e.g. work, household chores, walking) during false labor must have been a man. There is no way one can do anything while twisted by pain.