Here is a selection of situations that show you've been too long in China. There are hundreds of them so I selected a few for you. Of course if you've been in China you will know what they're talking about. If you haven't been in China yet, what are you waiting for?
Thanks Ingrid for sharing :)
You know you've been in China for too long when...
- you don't know how to cook pasta "al dente"
- you know where to go to have fun or dinner with only 20RMB (2 euros)
- booking a train ticket you ask for a soft seat
- you can help bargaining in a shop
- you look over someones shoulder to see what they read
- you want to exit the subway, you say nothing, and push everyone at the last moment
- you're not surprised when 4 men arrive to change a light bulb
- people think you're Russian
- you want to have a conversation with someone standing at least 10m away
- you believe that pushing the button of the elevator 63 times will make it go faster
- you don't know people are supposed to pay the license of a software
- you think that 5 euros for a T-shirt is way to much
- you can't eat Chinese food anymore with a fork and a knife
- you follow foreigners in Carrefour to see what they buy
- you switch off the lights of your car at night to save the battery
- you watch cctv9 because it's the only channel in English
- you walk around with an umbrella to protect yourself from the sun
- a friend is sick you advise him to drink hot water to heal
- you have more than 10 zips or other shiny elements on your jeans
- you start liking warm beer
- you have at least 2000 DVD at home
- you enter one of the most fashionable club in Shanghai wearing Crocs, short pants and a yellow T-shirt
- you explain to your friends that chopstick are more convenient to eat
- you fart in the elevator, who cares about the bad smell
- you haven't cooked in years
- you only have 1 fork and 1 plate in your kitchen
- you believe the Hello Kitty seat covers you just bought are perfect in your new BMW
- you're not surprised anymore to see someone wearing high heels and a pyjama
- you can sleep anywhere, including in the crowded bus
- you gave up looking for beauty products without whitening effect
- you do a "peace V" sign each time you're on a photo
- you feel insulted when only 3 waiters welcome you in a restaurant
- you take a nap at IKEA
- you don't try to understand how a Chinese man who earns 300 euros per month can have a Mercedes
- you think that taking more than 1 shower a week is too much
- you think that a town with less than 1 million inhabitants is a village
- you buy a new watch instead of changing the battery when it dies
- you believe Yao Ming is the best Basket ball player in the world
- you start to believe you're a sex symbol because each time you go to the market you hear "wow, you so handsome sir"
- you hold your business card with your 2 hands, even back home
- you find it unacceptable when shops back home close before midnight
- you find it normal when the waiter repeats your order and only has 2 dishes right out of 10
- people with white teeth scare you
- you have to ask for a new passport because you don't have pages left due to all the Chinese visas (L, F, Z, M, etc.)
- you only like pizza when it has corn and sweet things on it
- you use chopstick to eat your brownie in the plane on the way back home
- you put the red wine in the fridge and keep the white one at ambient temperature
- you're not surprised to see the woman who's searching the garbage bin answer her i-phone
- smoking is part of a meal
- you wear white socks with your suit
- you buy the DVD of movies that are not released in the US
- you answer "China" when people ask where you are from
- the more you watch the news on TV the least you know
- you know that even the Olympics are over you will still hear about it, at least until Shanghai 2010
- you're relieved to have read all of this and you know others have been through the same experiences.
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